So last night I got hit square in the gut with the realities of mom guilt. It totally sucks and no matter what you feel bad for whatever happened to have mom guilt tapping it’s foot and shaking its head rolling it’s eyes at you.
So what happened to have mom guilt taking its toll on me???
I was giving my 1 year old son a bath this time with his 6 year old sister. I reached to grab soap and a washcloth and Bam in that split second with me right there my son stood up my daughter grabbed him by the sides trying to help and his feet slipped out from under him and he hit his face full on the side of the tub. The sound was horrible he screamed immediately and I did the only thing I could in the moment pull hi in my arms and hold him as he cried and each tear ripped my heart for not stopping it from happening. I couldn’t believe it happened with me right there. His face pretty much immediately started swelling under his eye and above the eye was bleeding from a all split from the impact.
My husband and I were in crisis mode calling nurse lines trying to decide if we needed to take him to the hospital. After a few calls with a nurse line and family we decided to take him just to make sure everything was ok. We ended up in the emergency room. At 9:00pm till 2am. Thankfully after the doctors check up and a CT scan we were sent home with the all clear but just keep watch of him don’t let dirt get in his eye till it heals.
But even after the doctors and nurses and family members telling me stuff happens you did what you needed to after it happened that’s all you can do speechs. I sit here ripping myself apart over what I could have done differently or how in the world I let something anything happen to my baby. Ya mom guilt totally sucks!!;